You are here:

The Lilypads

Jokes and Riddles

E-mail Print PDF

Laugh alone or laugh with someone. Laughter is a good way to brighten up your day and it gives your lungs a good workout!  These are my originals. Enjoy!

Question: When do chicks hatch?
Answer: At the crack of dawn.

Question: Why are the penguins leaving Australia?
Answer: They are afraid of the New South Wales (whales).

Question: Which is the most tasty computer?
Answer: Apple.

Question: What is the easiest dessert to get at a campfire?
Answer: Warm brownies.

Question: Which is the messiest state of America?
Answer: Massachusetts.

Question: What did the bear do after dinner?
Answer: Bear-up (burp).

Question: Which is the noisiest part of your body?
Answer: Your ear drums.

Question: What is the fly's favourite stroke?
Answer: Flea-style.

Question: What should you do if you have trouble falling asleep?
Answer: Lie at the edge of the bed. You will soon drop off (to sleep).

Question: Which car is best to play with?
Answer: Toy-ota.

Question: Which car is most creepy?
Answer: The Beetle.

Question: Which is the saddest cake?
Answer: The wedding cake... it always has tiers (tears).

Question: Which is the saddest plant?
Answer: The weeping willow.

Question: What kind of card can you use for fishing?
Answer: NETS (Network for Electronic Transfers) ATM card.

Question: What is the most important thing to remember in chemistry but the least important to remember in baking?
Answer: Never lick the spoon.

Question: Why was the crab called to the principal's office?
Answer: It snapped at the teacher.

Question: What is the most polite piece of furniture?
Answer: A hi-chair (high-chair).

Question: What kind of housing is best for music?
Answer: A flat.

Question: What can your right hand do that your left hand can't?
Answer: Hold your left hand.

Question: How did the dog celebrate its birthday?
Answer: With a barbe-chew (barbeque).

Question: What will happen when you put a birth certificate into the freezer?
Answer: It becomes IC (icey).

Question: What did one monkey say to another on 1 April?
Answer: It's Ape-ril Fools Day!

Question: Who steals from the bathroom?
Answer: Robber duckie.

Question: What does a pig shower with?
Answer: Hogwash.

Question: Why did the mouse take cheese to church?
Answer: It wanted holey cheese.

Question: What did the fly say to the cashier?
Answer: Can I have this for flea?

Question: Why did the computer go to hospital?
Answer: It had a slipped disc.

Question: What does a pig use on its wounds?
Answer: Oinkment (ointment)

Question: Where do frogs go when they are ill?
Answer: Hopspital (hospital).

Question: Where can you find the toilet in buildings?
Answer: Level 3 (lavatory).

Question: What do you call polluted air?
Answer: Toxigen (toxic oxygen)

Knock knock!
Who's there?
Anna.
Anna who?
Annather visitor at the door!

Question: Why are mice afraid of Christmas?
Answer: They don't want to meet Santa Claws.

Question: What do you call a very large mouse?
Answer: Enor-mouse (Enormous).

Question: What do you call a well-known mouse?
Answer: Fa-mouse (Famous).

Question: What did the mother horse say to her baby?
Answer: Stop foaling around.

Question: What did the Queen Bee say to the other bees?
Answer: Bee-hive yourselves

Question: How does an ant watch TV?
Answer: With its antenna

Question: Which animal never plays fair?
Answer: A cheetah (cheater).

Question: What do you call a dog that loves to dive?
Answer: Scuba-doo.

Question: What is a car's favourite TV show?
Answer: Car-toon.

Question: Where do sick horses go?
Answer: To the horse-pital (hospital).

Question: What animal do you carry with you all the time?
Answer: Your calves.

Question: What can feel dry but is never dry?
Answer: Your mouth (there’s always saliva)

Last Updated ( Sunday, 12 July 2009 09:01 )